A F Harrold:The Film Collage Poem

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“The Film Collage Poem”
Artist: A F Harrold
Albums: An Englishman's Home Is His (Modestly Priced) Third Album (2006)

Er, this poem is my homage to the, er motion picture industry, er, 1939 to 2004 inclusive, er, if I remember my dates right.
It's a found poem, it's constructed of, er, other people's words, er but I did the constructing so thank you very much.
Here we go.


I've seen things you people wouldn't believe
Zulus, thousands of them
Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Rosebud
The horror! The horror!
My god, it's the truth!
You can't handle Tara
Infamy! Infamy! Dave don't cross the stream's
Gonna need a bigger
Are you looking at me, Mrs Robinson?
No moon, that's a space station
Flash! Flash! I'm an insect who dreamt he was snakes
Why did it have to be your wingman
Lick my stocking
I'd buy that for a dollar
Do you want me to seduce you balls of fire?
Mrs Robinson, if you don't mind my saying
First we'll have an orgy then open the pod bay doors Hal
I'm not bad, Smurfette doesn't fuck
I'm not bad, I'm Mrs Robinson
Dave! Play it Sam
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not bad
I'm just drawn that way
I'll be your wingman any day
Just whistle, Pussy Galore
I want the truth
Does your dog bite?
You can't fight in here
Is it still raining? This is the war room
Don't cross the streams, don't get them wet
I hadn't noticed, Dave
No more Mister Nice Duck
A hundred and six miles, it's dark
I love you but we only have
My blue blanket
Wax on Mrs Robinson, wax off Mister Keating
Or if you're slightly more daring
Oh Captain
I can't do that, Dave
And don't call me Shirley
I'll be your wingman
Even if it must be by burglary
Up to eleven feet smaller than my sister
My god it's total protonic reversal
Dispatch war rocket Ajax
My god it's an incredible smell you've discovered
I love the smell of a contender instead of a big nose Mum
Nobody puts baby in a wretched hive of scum and villainy, Dave
Oh Toto, you had me at hello, Gelfling
Frankly my dear, that's not a knife
The truth? Just put your lips together and kneel before Zod
Open the pod
God is our copilot
Fron-ken-shteen
It's a sad and beautiful world
Fickle finger of fate
Miss Scrumptious, blow the bloody doors off
Six shots or only five?
A hill of beans in this crazy evil Maharaja
I am a human being
I love you
You should be kissed, and often
And who's scruffy-looking in the morning?
I know
Do I feel lucky?
If there's a steady pay check in it
And we're wearing sunglasses in a corner
Aren't you a little short for a crucifixion?
Out of the door, line on the left, none more black
These are not the droids
I expect you to die
The fall will probably kill you
No disintegrations
Would you like to play a game?
My god it's a priest with an enormous erection
Play it once, Sam
Global thermonuclear war
I'll have what she's having, Dave
A bigger boat
My god it's trying to seduce me
Call me Shirley
Here's looking at you Mrs Robinson
Kiss me wearing a reindeer jumper
As if it were the last time
My god it's full of napalm in the morning
Gordon's alive
After all
I am your father
Tomorrow is another day
My god it's full of the most fun I've had without laughing
I am not a committee
My god
It's full of stars