A F Harrold:My Name Is Diana

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“My Name Is Diana”
Artist: A F Harrold
Albums: An Englishman's Home Is His (Modestly Priced) Third Album (2006)

Er, this is a poem in the voice of a giraffe.
And it's, um, it's, it's full of facts
'Cos I did a lot of research for this one
So er do pay attention
And you might learn something which is always nice.

Er like I say it's in the voice of a giraffe but I'm not going to attempt the accent
Because um I'm not sure exactly what accent a giraffe has
Having not really actually spoken to them.

Er anyway. Poem. Here we go.


Well
I'm a giraffe
Please do not laugh
I live on the savannah
My name is Diana

I like to eat leaves
From acacia trees
I'm up to eighteen feet tall
Have between two and five horns

I've got prehensile lips
And very high hips
I'm chestnut on pale buff
My tail ends in a tuft

My eyes large and lustrous
My tongue is quite dextrous
Because I'm so tall
I've seen it all

I've watched cheetah's cheating
Seen elephants meeting
I've seen antelope lope
I once met the pope

I'm afraid that's a lie
It was some other guy